I Got A Feeling… That Last Night Was A Really Good Night!!!

Last night I played a few songs I wrote on my guitar and watched Pride and Prejudice, one of my all time favourite movies ever, starring Miss Kierra Knightley. My facourite part is the end, when he says “Mrs. Darcey” over and over again (and not how you guys are thinking! Get your mind’s out of the gutter!). Ugh! What a romantic movie! I’m a sucker for 18/19th century romance movies… I’m like a sappy gumdrop. Love back then was pure and innocent and free. Much more than I can say about love today.

I want love like that. I want to love hard and purely and truly and like the song Truly, Madly, Deeply says, “I want to lay like this forever, until the sky falls down over me”.


Since when did it become a burdensome thought to want real, genuine, pure love? To have two incandescent hearts, burning with the heat of love, passion and desire seems merely a thing of the past. Now, it’s all about passion and lust, but how can those things flourish without love? Love is what’s missing from the equation. People can easily sleep with one another and feel nothing at all? Is that humanly possibly, when your souls have forever been intertwined? Isn’t that why rape is such a disdainful, disgraceful act, because the act of making love is forced upon someone that doesn’t feel the same way? Can it be said that when we sleeping with one another without feeling love for each other, that we are raping ourselves of the benefit of feeling an emotion that was built into that act, ordained by the High Priest, God, Himself?

What are we doing?

Sex is not just a thing. It’s not just a past time to be done with everyone. How do I make such rash statements? Well have you ever spoken to a woman that has had many multiple partners in her life? She may not want to disclose the information with you, but more than likely, she is a lot looser. A lot of men are resorting to anal sex with women now because they are looking for a tighter hold/grip/feel. It’s not a secret. This is very real. (There is supposedly a trick older women know about, with the use of vinegar, to tighten things back up… which is for another blog entry. If you guys want to hear about it, email me or comment on the blog). But even when that plug gets loose and expires, what then?

When is enough enough? When do we as women decide to take back the power? Mr. Secret has taught me a valuable lesson. You can’t assume anything. Love is put into action, AND words. You have to have solid proof that someone loves you back before you take anything to the next level, or will be the one with the face in the pillow, sobbing with silent tears.

I’m done. I’m waiting. I’m not pushing anything. If he’s a real man, he’ll step up and claim his prize. I know the way I want and deserve to be loved. I have so much love to give, and I want to be able to feel the love too. It has to be reciprocated. I’m not putting myself in a situation where I’m with someone but I feel like I’m with no one. That’s a mess. What’s the sense in being in a relationship if you feel all alone? I wish all my fans the greatest love that blossoms and blooms each day like the renewed spring flowers after a brutal winter.

I want to feel incandescently, incalculably, incomparably, in love! Is that too much to ask??

Carmen xoxo

“Mrs. Darcey, Mrs. Darcey, Mrs. Darcey….”

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