I Promise

I told myself
I wouldn’t let you win
That’s what this has become
A damn game
To you

And who winds up suffering
In the end?
My sorry ass
I’m left
Full of emotions
Filled with anger
I want to yell and scream
Hurt you
The way you hurt me
Because hurt people
Hurt people.

Damn.

I’m no better than you.
We had a good “thing” going
If we can call it that
And you decided
I wasn’t worth the time
The patience
The effort.

Fuck you!
Why am I the one
Left…

You know you really hurt me?
You really don’t even care
You sadistic
Heartless… oh my God…
I’m so full
My cup is running over
And I’m reaching for the Hem on His Garment to wipe up the mess I’ve made…

… yet, nothing seems to work… nothing seems to make you budge…
I don’t have enough sanity left.
I want to, but I don’t…
I want to love you less…
I can’t…
And I wish you had a fraction of what I do for you…
Maybe then you’d care
When I tell you
You’re
Breaking
My
Fucking
Heart…

Carmen xoxo

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