So I’m seeing that I need to just keep away from men, period. Maybe right now is not the time to concentrate on forming bonds or friendships, or doing anything out of context with any man? I just feel deep down that I have something like the Midas touch, but instead of everything turning to gold, these guys get scared, fall in love, go crazy, or pull away from me. Then when I try to figure out what’s going on, I realize that I have to let them go, because the more I try to assure them that I am a friend, or I love them, or I don’t want any trouble, the more they shrink away.
I know what this is about. Not only is God protecting me from making huge mistakes, but He is showing me that I need to be patient. I guess during my waiting period, in order for me to remain virtuous, I can’t even form close friendships that are slightly tainted or threatened by sexual lust.
This has been an interesting week. It hurts me to my core that I’ve pretty much had two “friends” taken away from me. Both have apparently lost interest in being my friend, but both live their lives in the ruin of strong sexual sins. It hurts, but I know Gid is calling me to higher heights, to live my life better and remain true to Him and His words. Time to move forward. It hurts so much though.