Why am I up at 1am writing a blog? I’m driven by anger. I’m so sad and disappointed. I went to see my favourite artist of all time for the first time ever yesterday at BB Kings in Times Square. I went to see none other than Raheem DeVaughn. It was amazing. He reminded me why he has been my favourite artist for the past 5 years, since his first album dropped in 2005 (The Love Experience). Now I know that a great artist may not be a great person, but I guess I anticipated a totally different person.
After an amazing performance, I decided to wait on a line for about 30 minutes to see him. My friend and I patiently waited. She wanted to go home, but she knew how much it meant to me to meet him. Raheem DeVaughn’s music brought me through some tough times when I was away in college, and I had no one. When I moved back to the city, I grew to love him even more, and by the time his second album dropped, I was a fanatic. I had to remind myself that he is just a man. Well tonight I saw that very clearly.
He was cocky, arrogant and he had an air. I mean, I get it. He is better looking in person, trust me, and pictures do him no justice. He has a beautiful smile, but everytime he smiled, it looked generic. It was a smile that was put on, with no emotion behind it, but you could never tell from the pictures. I guess that comes with the territory of trying to give a damn when signing albums and spelling names and taking pictures with a bunch of cougars and young women that are obsessed with you. I bought an album for 15 bucks and he signed it. You had to purchase some form of merchandise in order to see him, even though a couple of hood rats just rudely interrupted people and took pictures of him while he signed cd’s and took pictures with other people. There was even a group that talked to him while he signed the cd of the girl in front of me. She had to turn around and tell them that those few seconds were hers; she bought her merchandise and that was her time to speak to speak to him. She was right. You barely got a minute with him anyway! Damn hood rats.
When it was my turn, I then proceeded to try to speak to him and tell him how much I appreciated his music. He tried to multitask by asking me how to spell my name and pretend to give a shit about how I felt about his music. I told him I was a huge fan, and he said that he was a fan of me being a fan. Lame. It was so fake. You know when you can feel someone being slight with you? Then it all went downhill after that. I had to tell him that “Soulmate” was my favourite song ever and that he should have left it on the Love Experience album. I also asked him if he could put it out. Why did I have to say that? His entire countenance changed. “You just gave yourself away. You got the bootleg”. I saw in his face that he was upset. I had no time to even explain to him that I had purchased every album he ever put out TWICE, and that I had all his separate singles, and songs he had done with others, like “We Are One” on the Maze album. I didn’t have time because he already took a picture with a fake smile and sent me on my way. I wanted to tell him that I never did buy a bootleg, and that he was worth way more than that to me. I wanted to tell him that my friend that is a dj had given it to his sister and she had passed the song along to me, and I had never known about it being a bootleg cd. I wanted to tell him that there was some misunderstanding.
As I sat on the long train ride home, from Manhattan, local, through Brooklyn, into Queens, I had a lot to think about. The way I hyperventilated and had to use my asthma pump when he sang, the way he hit every note perfectly, the energy, the awesome band and back up singers that were equally as good all came racing through my mind, but the biggest thought that I could not shake loose, was how totally disappointed I was. I was so hurt.
Now I know I will continue to love his music, and I’m quite sure I will continue to purchase his albums and support him as an artist, but I have once again, learned that the celebrity that I deeply loved was nothing like what I expected.
Honestly, Raheem DeVaughn sings about love, positive energy, peace, and second chances. I expected a humble guy. I really wouldn’t expect him to respond the way he did to my question.
His voice, to me, sounds like heavenly angels. Every note glorifies the talent God has placed within him. I do appreciate his music, and every fiber in my being acknowledges his musical greatness. No if, ands or buts. I just wish that he didn’t assume that I was a bootleg cd buying person. Even if I was, the fact that I love his music enough to stand in the cold, and then wait in lines, spend money on him, and still say I love him as an artist should say something. So yes! There! I’ve said it! I’m mad, and I’ve thrown away the notion of us singing together or making our own music! Ha ha ha!
Well, I guess I need to make my own records. One day, one day all these songs I write won’t go to waste. I’ll be singing on stage somewhere, I pray, soon. Forget you Raheem, you mean jerk. I can’t believe he was able to make me feel so sad after seeing such an great show. How was that possible? I will always love your music though.